I am using blogger now ~~~~
USING BOTH BLOGGER AND LIVEJOURNAL.
WOOO ~ 
www.brennaboink.blogspot.com
SAME WITH POONY POINK.

You can check out www.poonyponk.blogspot.com
www.sherrichy.blogspot.com
www.muaahaha.blogspot.com

GO GO GO ! 

Alright... there are several things that I gotta complete today.
And it is a MUST MUST MUST thing.

Firstly, I'm gonna have my Mac which I just ordered online. (Y)
Then i'll do my physics homework.
Have a 15 mins break and continue with my a.math homework.
I must must must complete my physics homework today.

Plan for basketball today is cancelled.
Perhaps another day would be better due to the rain.

I'm grade 7 for piano now.
Which means... the fees have increased, more books for me to buy and pracitse.
Grade 6 theory may kill me anytime.
gosh...
The thought of it makes me wanna stop piano but on the other hand,
I told myself not to.
After so many years of hard work I'm not gonna give up.
I shall complete my grade 8.

That's all for now.
I'm watching "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" on star world now while waiting for my food.

Ciaos people~
Dance lesson starting in another week. (can't wait)
I swear my whole body's gonna ache, ache and ache.

I shall just let nature takes its course.
Though i'm still a bit confuse to make the right choice but...such stuffs are hard to consider.
It's either I continue waiting and get what I've wanted for so long.
OR
I continue waiting and get hurt once again.

I've finally let go of my feelings that has been kept in me for so many months.
I feel happy that I've clarrified somethings with you.
At the same time I feel sad that I didn't tell it to you earlier.
To say the truth, I've regret what I have done.
Regret making that wrong step.

Both of us are hurt.
you have already overcome that hurt.
For me, no.
Counting down from today...
It'll take me another year and approximately a week to await for that day.
I hope you will wait too.
I hope that both of us will be together again.
hopefully you will not fall for other girls.
(I've got this feeling you will.)

anyway... I have seriously paid a terrible price for O lvls.
I gave up my hapiness for O lvls.
I am gonna work hard with my out most potential
so that I know that I've not make the wrong move.

Sorry to my Co comittee for not helping you guys with the duties.
Sorry to Mr Goh for not handing up my homework today.
Sorry to Mr Yeong for not attending your lesson today.
& for not doing your homework.

1 year... I can do it.
Just like what I did last year. I'm sure I can.
I believe in myself & I do believe in you too.

God, thankyou for entrusting me this chance again.
I'll hold on to it as tight as possible.
cherish it & stay contented with it.
I'm happy that I've got such great friends around me.
With you around, I'm sure my life would be perfect.
Perfect in a way that I would be happy everyday.

All the best to whye nam(red team) for your friday's match with hwa chong.
I'll be there to support you guys ^^.
WOO ~

the determined me still doesn't want to give up.
Giving up is what I've gotta do but I can't.

I'm still determined.
Leaving hope in everything.

Hope, faith and my dream is what I believe in.
but apparently, its hurting me deeply.

Leaving every shattered pieces of my heart un-fixed.

What am I suppose to do with them?
who will be the one to fix them back again?

Its been 11 months, my stubborness hasn't except the fact.

every single bit of moment spent with you were my happiest days.
Am I suppose to cherish it or forget about it?

I can't stop. I seriously can't.
I can't stop thinking about the past.

I just want it simple, but these simple things I want can't be given by you.
We're living in 2 different worlds.

you meet different people, difficulties.
I meet another type of different people and difficulties.
You live under a wealthy family.
I live under a ruined family.
You live happily.
I live _________.

FUCK !
NABEI.
I hate myself for being this way.
I hate myself for thinking too much.
I hate myself for making the first move to know you.
I hate myself for being so naive.
I hate myself for being too nice to you.

In the first place,

If it wasn't because of my ego I will not be in this state.

didn't attend a.maths lesson today.
didn't go for CO today either.
Layed on my bed till about near 11.

met tingting @ the market about 12 near 1pm.
sorry tingting for making you wait.
Bought our lunch and went up to klins's place.
Board 28 to Singapore basketball court.
Went there to support klins, MJ, J & K.

after their matched we went to munch something.
Went back to the court again.
Wasted  our time there and left the place for home.
Bus home via 28 again.

Was reminiscing while I closed my eyes.
Flashed back started running through my mind.
Could feel the tears slowly gathering around my eyes.
but luckily none fell.
My mind kept thinking and thinking till I dozed off.
How I wished there was a shoulder to lean on everytime I sleep on the bus.
Why am I always the one shouldering people?
When will others shoulder mine?

Got off the bus.
And raindrops started falling down on my head.
Once again, I thought about this.
How I wish somebody was there to share with me a umbrella, sending me home.
I wanted to follow klins and ting for another round of dinner but decided not to.
Wasn't emotionally stable. Was real afraid that if I were to go to ting's place again I might burst out of tears.

I am I always holding back onto those memories?
I am always telling others to forget them but I myself can't.
Am I that weak?
I don't think so.
Why WHY do you always appear out of my life suddenly?

GRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
I MUST STOP.
Spell STOP
s-t-o-p !


anw.......................
I am always getting sucky treatment from _ _ _ _.
Feel in the blanks. Thankyou ! (:

PS : today isn't a good day.

Apparently, it is 6:14AM.
The previous post I posted was 1:39AM.
I didn't sleep @ all.
I started doing my homework around 2.40AM.
COOLIE ~ because I finished my whole post about 2.20 and had a lil chat with my dear poonie.
Random blog hopping... and started with my PHYSICS homework.
Thankgod I did the MCQ part the other time (:

So I did my a.maths homework.
Amazingly I completed it in 20mins. (quite fast uh)
I know those who are better than me in a.maths will think that I'm slow.
Wuteva~

I sat on my table, staring into blank space.
Thinking whether should I sleep or not to sleep.
Thought about it for 10mins and started packing the unwanted waste paper and plastic bags in my drawers.
Ya... werid people keep plastic bags in their drawer.
Weird people like me.

Packed everything and tadah ! 
here I am blogging now.
Chatting with Jingheng online. (this is the longest conversation I ever had with JH)
Though my room seems a lil messy still but its much neater compared to the previous time.
At least my table has space for me to do work now...

Felt that we humans have SERIOUSLY taken granted of what we have.
The amount of paper each human use makes me think the amount of tress we have killed.
Worse of all is PLASTIC. The amount of plastic we humans have produce and yet once thrown away can't be decomposed.
Guess on the 21st of december 2012, it'll be our last day on earth?
The date that i've just mentioned may not be the accurate one because it is just some reference I saw on history channel.

Have been watching TV lately.
Not drama, not cartoon... ok. maybe a lil cartoon of spongebob and powerpuff girls but mostly on history channel.
Yeayea... you may think I may be a boring person watching all these geeky sttuffs but it is interesting.
The recent show I watched was talking about NOSTRADAMUS.
I cannot imagine how does people back in the 1500 predict our future.
Its pretty scary but yet amazing.
What Nostradamus predicted about our future is similar to what we're facing now.
He predicted 9-11 that happened in America.
Predicted something like tsunami that happened in our neighbouring countries.
Can you imagine how did that guy think about all these things?  

Okay.. shall stop my nostradamus thingy.
Its 6:44AM. 3 hours and 15 mins more till my physics lesson starts.
I shall have my breakfast now (:
honey stars with banana milk.
My brother is currently sleeping on my bed.
Wonder when is my group gonna complete the chinese project.
If I've the file now I'll definitely try to do something with the slides.
crap crap crap ~ 
HOW?

Going off now.
byebyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~

The time now is 1.39AM.
I've got Physics lesson later on @ 10AM.
I gave my piano lesson a miss. ( I changed tuesday's lesson to wednesday )
Met Jeremy and bro for dinner just now.

I'm pretty busy with life that I now feel that blogging is just something for me to do whenever I'm bored.
It ain't my hobby definitely because livejournal does not enable me to place twitter or blahblahblah other stuffs to make it look much more interesting too.

But here's a rough schedule for you guys to see what i've been doing for this week.
10am-12pm --- School (either physics or maths)
12pm-2pm --- lunch break (with minhui, natalie & Jasnyn)
2pm-5.30pm/6.00pm --- School (chinese coaching/bridging)
6.00pm ++ --- dinner
Once I get home, gotta bath and complete my a.maths homework.
Yea... That's about it.
Seriously speaking, its pretty tiring but I'm still able to take it.
Kinda feel that chinese coaching is useless too.
About 60 percentile of the chinese students wanna study but yet the other 40 percentile is blabbing all the way at the back.
How are those who wanna study gonna concentrate?

I'M NOT GONNA UPLOAD THE PICTURES TAKEN ON MY BIRTHDAY.


I'm curious why humans take things for granted.
Before I elaborate on some things that are running through my mind I wanna tell YOU this.
YOU , yea you. I think you know who I'm talking about.
That post I posted previously wasn't talking about you.
So don't worry. I know I've always been a "BIG BULLY" towards you.
What ever it is, it just wasn't talking about you so you don't have to feel so offended by it.
Done.

Alright... Like I've said about why we human take things for granted.
I seriously don't understand the situation going on between girl A and girl B.
Pretty obvious that one of the girl is my good friend right? YES. one of them is.
I hate to see my good friend being so upset over her friends.
Its happy to see that she's gotten back to her old time past lover.
BUT its very disheartening to see her moaning about her friendS.
A friend that has been by her side.
A friend that has known her since primary school.
A friend that would always make her laughter so pretty that shines every moment, everyday.

if YOU think that you're right. That perhaps I should say that you're WRONG.
I don't get it. Seriously... I don't.
I don't understand why must you hang out with a person she detest so much.
Hang out with that person not only once, but MANY times.
I can bet that she has complained about her infront of you. RIGHT in your face.
But guess its either you're too stupid or too ignorant to acknowledge it. (no offence)

You shouldn't deserve such a good friend like her.
I guess this time you have really crossed the line.
If you think that you're life would be so much better without her then tell her that.
Don't keep it behind from her because it'll just practically affect your mood, day and relationship between her.
It doesn't only affect you but her too.
So would just kindly stop enlarging the hole?

I've got every reason to post about this.
Thank god I wasn't over reacting just now.
Thank you poonie for cooling me temper down.
If it wasn't you, I guess I would have made this "not my situation" problem into a bigger problem.
I know I may seem like a busybody or what ever person to you guys out there who despise/ hates me.
But who cares? The most important thing is that I'm happy with my life.
If those of you out there who hates me for SOME reason or for no bloody reason....
GO AHEAD because I know I've not done anything to offend you.
god knows everything.

Ok... I know that I've done ONE thing that has made somebody feel fucking low.
Sorry to YOU now because previously I did treat you very good as a close friend too.
But yet you blamed me for setting you up into that relationship.
You were the one who has made the relationship seem worst everyday.
I tried to help but i still didn't work.
If you still think that I'm the bad person, go ahead because I know I've done the right thing.
I shall leave all these proving stuffs to god.
I'm sure he knows all the things that we have done.
He knows how to see the picture much clearer and even out the right and wrong stuffs correctly.

For now... I shall just stop because I've not completed my a.maths homework.
I slept for 4hours just now. (a short nap?)
Chinese project is gonna be so DOOMZXZ
L-A-M-E. whatever.

I should just stop myself from thinking about you.
You've forgotten about me (I guess) or maybe you've already regarded me as a normal friend.
I should not care about how you are anymore.
I should just carry on with my life and wait for a better one to come.
no point hanging on to you in the midst of no where.
i've been doing that for the past 7/8/9 months.
Guess you came into my life teaching me how to be much more patient.
I should thank you for doing that.
I shall draw lines between our friendship from now on.

That's all ! 

Do you even think we even care how you fucking feel?
This is US. YOU should know us well enough.
Hah. Guess you're just trying to provoke us in someways.
I don't know, but to me I assume that you're doing it to make us feel aggitated or whateva crap.
I don't really give a fucking damn about it.

Science centre yst since its already past 12.
Body world was amazing.
I admire those who were bold enough to sacrifice their body for this exhibition.
It looks kinda fake though.

ECP later on.
Can't wait because... I've got no idea.

So after science centre I had CO.
CO AGAIN. I KNOW ! 
pretty sick to here this again right?

I went to city hall's flash and splash outlet just now and apparantly the bag that i've always wanted has been sold.
WHAT THE FUCK ?!?!?!
I've been wanting that bag for the past 4 months.
That bag caught my eye during the june holidays.
Felt like a dumb horn bird (don't know what bird it is) not to buy that bag at that time.
I really regretted now buying it.
So yea... bro accompanied me to the outlets @ orchad ion and heeren.
THEY DON'T HAVE IT EITHER.
I should have been more smarter. At least take not of the item code.
GAHHHHH ~ 
I am very angry with myself.

But after all... Had a sumptous dinner @ some japanese restuarant in Orchad ion.
I've forgotten the name of the restaurant but I would say that that has been one of the best jap rest I've been too.
I like (Y).
Last day of school's on my birthday.
Pretty happy to hear that my parents don't have to go to school to meet the teachers.
I gotta edit class tee design later on @ tmall.
Bet no one's gonna accompany me guess I shall just do it alone AGAIN.
I've got no fucking idea if me and sherri's going out later on too.
everything's just so fucking last minute.
I HATE IT.
I HATE IT.
I HATE IT.
I HATE THINGS TO BE LAST MINUTE.

There ! 
Done with my post.
I'm feeling very upset that I couldn't get the bag that I wanted.

Like i've said... I went out alone today to repair my phone and borrow some books.
YAY ~ I've finally borrowed 2 books from the library.

Sad to say... today my classmates checked their combined results.
Whereas I didn't.
F*** ! I wanted to know how many subs did I pass and fail.
Ok. I know i'll definitely fail my PHYSICS.

seriously... the song monking bird is STUCKED on my head.
I'm not happy with myself.
NOT NOT NOT ! 
Now i know why my shoulder's aching like crap.
Feel like sleeping away all my sorrows.
Piano lesson later.
After like 1 month or more than that I finally go for piano lesson.

I've CONFIRMED that i've with draw out from my stupid suona exam.
so what if i get back 20% of it? I'm seriously not in the mood to blow my instrument already.
3 more fucking days to my fucking birthday.
I'm really very fucking confuse. I'm real fucking angry with my results.
I must be better. I gotta be better. I am better.
I grow stronger day by day. I am stronger than ever.
I gotta stand firm with my goals.
I am gonna accomplish them. YES I MEAN IT AND I WILL DO IT.
I am decisive with my choices.
I must care for myself more than others.
I must no longer give in to others.
I give in to myself.

I think I suck to get such results.
It sucks because I feel small.
I don't feel great. I don't feel proud.
I shall brush up and be strong after this holidays.
Strong enough to tear down all the walls I have in this world.

To say the truth, I'm jealous with my very good friend results.
I don't know what to do. I gotta work with the feeling I'm having now.
I don't know how will you feel when you see this.
GAH... I'm speechless.

I shall sleep my sorrows away.
bye.

I gave school a miss today.
Gonna repair my phone later on > get my fav (Y) chicken > borrow books.
Yea ~
Head home, finish up my work.
& I'll see how it goes again.
I've played mocking bird for the past 24 hours on my mp3.
wooo ~
I'm super addicted to that song.

bodyworks @ science centre tmr.
woooo ~ cool.
luckily I charged my cammy's batt already.
c905 get well soon. momma will miss you. (LOL!) 

I'm very very very very upset with my a.maths results.
I was expecting a PASS for myself.
Ended up, failing 3 marks just like what happened for my SA1.
Its 1:16AM right now.

I'm pretty happy that all of us have finally finalize on our dance class.
We'll be learning it at O school.
I can't wait.

Class tee is making me feel guilty.
CO makes me feel like COCK.

As days come closer... I'm more afraid.
because I'm afraid what i'm expecting will not happen.
I hope he still does remember.

Thanks bro -.- for your company today.
really appreciated it.

FYI : I just killed like 10ants in one go. (*AWESOME*)

I feel very upset with myself now.
Why am I always looking back?
Why aren't I looking forward?
What's wrong?

Had a great chat with Nich.O just now.
When i mean GREAT it means FANTASTIC.

SLEEP ~ ~ ~ ~ 

I'm finally done with my essay on sucess ~ 
ITS 12.59AM now.
I'm still surviving...
Chatting with poonie on msn now.
School later on in another like 6hours ++ time?
Hopefully I won't fall asleep in class.
Perhaps sleeping in class is a good idea since its just the going through of papers.
I sound like a SHINGZ bad student.

Wutever~
I wanna sleep like now ?
cos its like 1am ?! I'm freaking left with 5hours and 15mins of sleep.
Byebye ~

The right one just hasn't come.
I shall just wait....
WOOOOOOO ~ 
FEELING SO RANDOM.
=.=

I'VE STILL NOT DONE THE ESSAY. (1/4 done ONLY !!)
I'VE DONE SOME OF THE CORRECTIONS ONLY.
WAHHHHHH ! I FEEL LIKE SLAPPING MYSELF NOW.

YAY ! AWESOME.
I ROCK 10,000 times.
^.^)

OK BYE ~ 

I've spent most of my time sleeping today.
What a loser.
Despite sleeping for long hours I still feel weak.
I gotta be strong ! (WOO~!)

Gotta complete my physics assignments now.
So long~

I thought I wouldn't be going out but in the end I did.
Went out with poonypoink to catch Julie and Julia.
I (Y) like that show a lot.

poonypoink and I were very random today... LIKE JINGHENG.
I think I've saw a sandal that I like.
The state of me still wanting the VOLCOM bag is still in my bag after several months.
Still VERY crazy over it.
I pray to god that the last piece is still in the shop.

Random walking around the 3malls including the bus interchange for about 45mins.
Got to realised that I actually DROPPED my ez-link card in the theatre.
Thankgod the golden village staffs check the cinemas.
So... in the end, I got back my ez-link card.

Poonypoink and I went seperate ways after collecting my ez-link card.
1.Got home.
2. Folded the clothes.
3. Bathed.
4. A quarell sparked between my bro and mom and later on my dad came into the picture.
5. I sat quietly in my mom's room, peeking at the situation in the living room.
6. Dad came in and gave my my allowance.
7. I said sorry to Dad for no reason. (hmmmm...)
8. Dad said I didn't do anything wrong and he was happy with me. (YES!)
9. I told Dad that I'll inform him my results when I've gotten everything back.
     (Prepared for a pretty long conversation during the weekend.)
10. Dad packed stuffs and left home.
11. Mom hitted bro on the chest (OUCH!)
12. Mom questioned bro
13. Bro told the truth about the past. (FINALLY, didn't know how long was he gonna keep that from her.)
14. Mom and bro having cold war now.
15. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO NOW

To sum everything up for the night:

what a bad night... I just gotta do my part and protect myself from getting arrows pierced into me when dad is around.
Just do my part as a filial daughter. (I'm trying to be one.)
I don't know when will this stop, I don't know how to patch things up.
I hope that this will stop forever.
Trying to patch things up for now is impossible because things have gotten from bad to worse.
This is my life. I accept it, I embrace it, I learn from it.

I gotta wake up EARLY tmr just to open the door for my instructor to take AN instrument.
AS EARLY AS 8AM.

I'm ANGRY that I didn't do well for my physics.
Felt that I was a total let down to my parents, tutor and teacher.
Mom put in so much effort to encourage me.
Tutor put in so much effort to teach and go through certain chapter with me.
Mr Goh putting in so much effort to give us worksheets for us to practise.
Though this are just small little signs of gestures but if you sum it all up,
it'll actually be a big impact on how well or how fine you're doing.
Once again, I don't know what I'm talking about.

Just came back not long. (like an hour ago -.-)
Went to the airport to sent my cousin off.
His going to maldives for his poly attachment for 2months.
Its just an island. Wanna know more ? check out wiki
Went to Changi village to had my dinner.
Sumptious WANTON MEE for dinner.

Perhaps shopping with sherri and poon tmr?
I don't know. Not confirm. Last minute decisions.

The thought of me going back to school tmr makes me wanna burst in tears.
Sec 4E & 5NAs has graduated from the school.
Next year would be my turn.
I'm not waiting for that turn to come.
I don't wanna leave East View.
I enjoy being in East View.

Weiting switching back to blogger makes me wanna use back my blog too.
Livejournal can't add c-box, twitter and many many other stuffs.
Its kinda restricted. I do not like ! 
May consider bout it again.

I just feel like taking out my contact lens, fold the SHINGS clothes on my bed, bath and "POMP!" lie on my bed and fall asleep.
SHINGS was a new word I learnt from natalie today.
Was hyper active in class for the first half of the day and soon...
I could feel that my energy level decreased after recieving my chem and english results.
CHEM affected me the most.
Oh well... This is a lesson for me to buck up and be stronger.
Infact I feel that I've grown stronger.

That's all I wanna say.